Sarcastic Movie Review: Brightburn

And about those ‘perfect parents’, there’s a scene in the movie where Brandon’s parents kind his secret stash of porn mags under his bed, only jumbled up with the bra ads and such are disturbing sketches and pictures of the human anatomy. After which his dad decides to give him the worst fucking birds and the bees talk in the history of human kind. When you find your roided up alien baby has human organs in his jerk off material, maybe telling him to give into his instincts from time to time isn’t a smart move.

To conclude ‘Brightburn’ feels like a movie nobody asked for but everyone wished they had. The exact opposite of ‘batman v superman’ which everyone asked for and immediately regretted after. Though it doesn’t go much beyond its initial setting and plot it’s an interesting enough concept and self-contained story that any comic book fan hankering for a dark take on ol’ supes should definitely check out.

And it might even be the movie to begin the Dark justice league universe. Can’t wait for the Batman one in which Bruce Wayne kills his own parents for the inheritance and grows up to be a spoiled rich brat with a latex fetish.   

If you want tales of the original superheroes from history such as Achilles and Hercules, check out the New World Odyssey series