Categories: Listicles

5 times Batman couldn’t keep it in his pants (when he really should have!)

For a man who dresses in a giant bat costume Batman’s got game. But other than the fact that he dresses like a flying marsupial you can understand why he would be such a hit with the ladies. The handsome billionaire who if some (annoying) fans are to be believed can win a fight against god himself, surely can have his pick of women in the dating scene.

Which begs the question why he has so many questionable exes! For a guy who’s all about upholding justice, the Bat sure does not seem too bothered about bending the rules when it comes to his dating life. 

Catwoman/ Selina Kyle

Let’s start with his most famous, on again off again romantic partner Catwoman. This relationship has been going on for so long and has almost been normalized in pop-culture, so much so that it’s easy to forget that she is an adult women who constantly dresses up as a cat, and you know A CAREER CRIMINAL, one of those bad people batman has sworn to protect the city of Gotham.

Guess justice is unforgiving only if the culprit is not a sexy lady in a cat costume huh Bruce? But this relationship is downright vanilla compared to the other ones on this list. 

 

Thalia al Ghul

So maybe cat women is forgivable, I mean she’s primarily a thief at the end of the day. I mean it’s not like batman is going around sleeping with murders or anything.

Oh wait yes he is!

Enter Thalia al’ Ghul, one of the high ranking members of the league of assassins. That’s right assassins! Oh she also happens to be the daughter of the Leagues leader Ra’s al Ghul, another mass murder with a messiah complex.

That does tell us why Thalia is so enamored with Batman at least (daddy issues) but it sure doesn’t explain why Bruce goes along with it, except that he has the willpower of a squirrel any time a pretty face is involved.

This isn’t just a casual little romantic tussle either, they have a kid together. Damian Wayne the latest in batman’s long line of robins is Thalia and Bruce’s son, the result of a passionate night they shared together after Thalia drugged him up of course.

Look at that scowl and hairline, No paternity test needed

And how did the dark knight respond to hearing all this for the first time: with brooding silence like always.

Bekka

So Brucy has a thing for the bad girls (I mean I don’t blame him). But he’s still a paragon of justice, there are still boundaries he won’t cross. And it’s not like Selina or Thalia were married of anything.

Enter Bekka, one of the New Gods from the planet of New genesis, a planet full of super human beings. Bekka is a native of the planet, and is an exceptional fighter and quiet the beauty as well, which means batman just had to sleep with her. Oh and she’s also married to Orion.

Orion, another one of the new gods, is a pseudo-member of the justice league and the adopted son of Highfather the ruler of new genesis. Orion himself is held in high regard as a general of the planet as well.

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Giorgio Groom

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