Sarcastic Movie Review: Lamb (2021)

What…What the hell did I just watch?

I went into the movie Lamb not knowing anything about it. from the poster and it’s naming I was expecting a sort of indie horror flick with references to Christianity and cults seeing as how prevalently Lambs are used for symbolism in the Christian Mythos. Lamb was definitely not that.

 

Lamb was not even a horror flick, not really. While there are elements of horror in it, and some rather disturbing cinematography and themes in play that definitely gives it the feel of horror, the overarching story does not fit the horror category.

I would call it a psychological thriller but, the truth is it’s not very thrilling. It’s so slow and languid at times you will find yourself slightly dreaming of other things, like lamb chops.

What lamb feels like is a tale from old folklore set in modern times, set in a depressing and lonely atmosphere. And even that’s not really doing the story any justice.

Which leads back to the original question of…What the hell did I just watch?

The Plot

Our story begins in a remote farm in the middle of nowhere in Iceland, run by a couple named Maria and her hairy husband Ingvar. The farm contains all the regular farmyard things like tractors, a friendly dog and you guessed it Lambs.

Then we get this scene set late into the night, with all the lambs being worried as they are attacked by a beast. But unlike let’s say a wolf, which would have killed and eaten the lambs, this beast chooses to impregnate one instead. And even though we don’t get a clear look at the creature, it is heavily implied to be a beast and not a severely disturbed man. (I mean its set in Iceland not Wales)

Someone got lucky last night

And if you think that a movie starting with Lamb impregnation is weird, trust me it only gets weirder

IT GETS WEIRDER

Soon birthing season arrives and the couple set out to help the sheep give birth to their kids, and everything goes smoothly except with one last mamma sheep, the one that we as viewers know is the one impregnated by the beast.

This sheep gives birth to her baby lamb after some effort, but from the reaction of the couple we can guess that something’s not right. Now we do not get a good look at the baby lamb, and Maria immediately covers it in a blanket and she takes the new born inside.

Now it is heavily implied that the couple lost a child in the past, and it is clear that Maria has started treating the baby lamb as a surrogate daughter.  And after the husband has a small emotional breakdown in his tractor, he seems to be onboard with the idea as well and they soon start calling the Lamb Ada.

But there is still someone unhappy with this whole setup, Ada’s real mamma lamb who persistently keeps bleating at them to give back her daughter. Soon one day when Ada is left alone, the mamma lamb does a daring kidnapping of Ada and tries to get her away from the human couple(how did this mamma  lamb open doors and stuff, I have no clue) The couple goes searching for Ada and finds her in the thick ever present fog with her real mother( Is this farm set in silent hill?)

It’s here we get our first look at Ada, and we find out that she’s a half lamb half human hybrid. Her body is mostly human with the head of a lamb. And at this point I did have to ask myself, if it really was a beast that fucked the sheep but we will get to the baby daddy later.

And it’s much cuter than you think 

The couple takes Ada back to the farm, being drowned by the infinite bleating of the Momma Lamb. And she keeps on complaining in the days to come to the dismay of the couple (with good reason).

One day when Ingvar is away Maria has enough and decides to an end to the Momma Lambs bleating by putting a bullet between her head (yikes lady!)

She does not want her husband to find out and she secretly buries the body, and we see just how far she is willing to go to keep Ada as her daughter