Categories: Listicles

5 cursed items in video games you shouldn’t pick up.

4. Victim of Fashion (Dragon Age: Inquisition)

Some cursed items are terrifying. Others are so catastrophically stupid that you have to wonder whether the developers were laughing when they put them in the game.

Enter the Victim of Fashion.

You can get this spectacularly terrible amulet in Dragon Age: Inquisition by finding a piece of inadequate chainmail on Dragon Island and taking it to Dagna. The result is an accessory that gives you +1 Cunning while simultaneously reducing your Magic, Melee, and Ranged Defense by 100%.

That’s not a trade-off. That’s a cry for help.

Even better, the item’s description basically admits the problem, calling it “an astoundingly bad idea.”

The name is also a joke about the classic fantasy “chainmail bikini” trope. Apparently, this particular fashion trend finally came with a stat sheet.

Fashion hurts. Literally.

5. Shabriri Grapes (Elden Ring)

At first glance, Shabriri Grapes look like exactly what their name suggests: some weird fantasy grapes you might find lying around in a dungeon.

Then you find out what they actually are.

These disgusting little items are described as “grapes” because they resemble eyeballs, and they play a major role in Hyetta’s questline. Apparently, they’re supposed to help her perceive the “light” she is seeking.

Which sounds bad enough.

The real problem is that Elden Ring has a habit of making you pick up mysterious objects without explaining what they are until you’ve already committed to carrying them around.

And once you realize you’re basically handing someone eyeballs and calling them grapes, the whole thing becomes considerably less appetizing.

They’re not necessarily the most dangerous item in the game, but they’re certainly among the ones you should reconsider picking up if you are not going for the most destructive ending in the game and value your lunch.

Bon appétit, Tarnished.