A Drunk Look At God (Being Agnostic)

Being Agnostic roughly means that nothing is known or can be known about god. It’s like saying the divine is a bit above my pay grade so I’d rather not meddle in it.

Heretic I hear the religious ones shout you have spoken Blasphemy. To you I ask something simple, If god is in fact all powerful and all-knowing then him giving me a sentient being of his own creation the ability to question his existence was really bad planning from his part. So please take your woes up with him, not me a mere instrument of his will… or her will, Cause you never know.

Hypocrite now it’s the Atheists turn to shout I have seen you in church. To which I say yes I do attend church on occasions but never on time, but you see I was born into an average Christian family and going to church has been part of my culture growing up and the truth is just that: religion is something that is an integral part of any community. And as I explained, I do not believe in the absolute that there is no god. I merely admitted that I had no idea about his existence. So if there is even a one percent chance that the big guy is up there listening, I’d rather not piss him off and have a few prayers in the bank.

So in a way being agnostic is a compromise between being religious and being a non-believer, the best part of which is that you can pick for yourself what you want from both worlds. And as any happily married man would tell you compromise is the key to a successful marriage, or at least that’s what their wives told them to say.

If this has offended anyone, that was never my intent and as the title explains I am profoundly drunk so I truly have no memory of what I have done. That being said I think I would like to conclude this, whatever this is with a little prayer my grandfather’s cousin’s best-friend’s sister’s husband used to say:

Oh God If there is a God, Save my soul if there is a soul.